Conflict is essential for fat lossJul 29, 2022
Everyone dislikes conflict. The very nature of the word suggests pain, disagreement and collision.
It stirs up several deep rooted primal instincts.
Rejection. Fight. Flight.
But is it actually a bad thing?
The opposite of conflict is trust, agreement, peace. Which all sound pretty good to me.
However, someone who provides zero conflict can also be called a "Yes wo(man)".
Which is less of a good thing when it comes to fat loss.
Because if you knew all you needed to know. If it was easy, and a peaceful, smooth process, then you'd be there already.
You would have either kept a healthy weight or lost it and kept it off.
So the truth is people NEED conflict. They need a different set of opinions and inputs to get what they want.People often think that conflict is an issue, or a sign that things aren't working and they should leave. In both coaching and personal relationships.
I'd argue that NOT conflicting, not arguing, just giving in and keeping quiet is a bigger issue.
You see, not arguing and not having conflict is a sign you don't care. That you've given in. Or see the situation as hopeless.
We must be willing to fight and struggle for things that are worthwhile.
Everything worth achieving takes 10 times longer than you think it will and is 10 times harder.
I find this hard as a coach as I am conflict averse. I'd rather pat people on the back and tell them "well done" than risk upsetting people.
But that doesn't actually help. That leaves people feeling good in the short term but not actually getting what they paid for or the goals they really, truly want.
Ironically, I am a better coachee than I am a coach. I am always open to feedback about how we run Sustain, how I operate as a coach, a business owner, a boy friend. I don't LIKE criticism but without it I can't grow and improve.
And so I seek it out and listen carefully when it's provided. In the same breath, feel free to reach out and give me some input, I really am all ears.
In life, we have weak spots and blindspots. Weak spots are the areas we know we aren't prolific and are working on. But more insidious are blindspots. The areas we have NO IDEA we are lacking and we can't see them. We are so lost in one area that we completely miss a bigger, more impactful area.
And when it comes to fat loss I am better placed than you to see these. Often people removed from a situation are better placed to give advice. So if I have sent you to this blog, please remember this:
I am advising you because I care about your health and happiness. We are a team and I want you to do well. I am going to say (or already have said) some things that you don't like or want to hear. But I am doing this because I believe it's for the best for you. Please remember this when I say something that you dislike and engage in the feedback as best you can.